Most of us who look back on our wedding day know that weddings are for making vows, but marriages are where we work at keeping those vows.
To all those who are beginning (and those who have seen the work it takes), here are a few things to consider in helping you keep the vows made on your special day. Remember that:
1. Vows are easy to make, but hard to keep.
Young people need to realize that there is more to marriage than just saying “I do.” Because we are human, we often fail to do the things we promise or would like to do. If we realize that there will be adversity, challenge, disappointments and surprises that make the keeping of our vows difficult, then we are better prepared to hang in there when the going gets difficult.
2. Live one day at a time.
Don’t think good or bad lasts forever. So many quit because they believe that their difficulties will never end. God says that He will not tempt (test) us beyond what we are able to bear (I Corinthians 10:13) and that includes the amount of time we can hold out as well. God provides what we need to keep our vows, but He does so one day at a time.
3. Give more than you get.
If you decide to give your all, even if it amounts to more than your partner is willing or able to give, you have overcome the greatest obstacle to a happy marriage – selfish pride. Your vow to love is truly complete when you are able to love unselfishly like Christ loves His church. This usually means that you are willing to give more than you receive (Philippians 2:3-11).
With time, people may not remember what their vows were, but God always remembers and always expects us to keep them until the end.
Discussion Questions
1. For unmarried people, write down three vows you would make on your wedding day. For the married, write down three vows you would make if you were renewing your vows.
2. Aside from fidelity, which vow do you find hardest to keep? Explain why.
3. Name several things required to enable a person to keep a vow.